There’s a director that asked me to do a few Don’t film me dying help me live shirt projects with him a couple of years ago. They were both bad horror films. My leading lady was the same in both–one had me die because a friend got jealous of her and killed me; the other had me die because she was some kind of crazy monster and needed to drink my blood to preserve her eternal youth. Both filming processes were very playful. There’s no pressure when you know it won’t be good anyway. There’s also this feeling of “Oh, God. I don’t want this associated with me. At all.” I cope by laughing it off. Making jokes. It isn’t hard–the movies are so bad that they’re funny. I never really feel like I’m wasting my time. If I’m learning about the filmmaking process, getting more experience, having a good laugh, and spending time with friends, it’s enjoyable. One of the other actors (the one that got jealous and killed me) actually joked about this the other day. Many inside jokes evolved from these films.
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The Jetplane used in the movie was a MIG-21, known for Don’t film me dying help me live shirt its 206 such failures in the Indian history, of which 78 resulted in the loss of lives of Pilots. More than losing an Army Pilot from India, and here I don’t want to sound selfish, but I grieved on the thought of losing such a close friend as Ajay was to his friends in the movie. Then the thought occurred to me of his mother, who lost his only child to the ARMY, in addition to her Husband years ago, who himself was a Colonel and died fighting in a war. I’d rather wish me to die before my partner to save myself the pain I’d suffer to see my partner leave me alone in this world. In which case, I’d rather my partner died with me to spare her the infinitely painful life to endeavor.